November 22, 2014

November 22, 2014.

Today a year ago, we stood before God and made a  promise.  

The chapel was quiet, all the other congregants  have left. It was just us and Him. 

We sat on the pews, and you pulled out the cue cards you had prepared. 

You held my hand, kept your nerves in check, and with God as our witness said;

You promised to be my best friend and support system, to be there through thick and thin. 

You promised to weather with me through every storm and anchor me in place.

You promised to be there for the good times and lend a shoulder during the bad.

You promised to stay loyal, faithful and true. 

You promised that in me, you would always find solace and a home; that together, we will face all that the world had to throw at us. 

You promised to love and cherish me, to make my happiness your priority.

You promised that in one year, you would make me your wife. 

Today, I went back to St Francis Xavier.

The chapel was quiet, it was just me and Him.

On the very same pew that you made your vows, I knelt and prayed for you. 

I prayed for safety and journey mercy for all your flights. I prayed for happiness and contentment in all that you do. I prayed for success in your future endeavours. I prayed for your health, especially your recurring asthma. I prayed for your family and your siblings. I prayed for your pet dog. 

I prayed that your football team will win all their matches. I prayed that you never have to circle more than twice to find a parking spot wherever you go; and a million other minute, unimportant things that you might need in your life. 

I prayed for your journey of faith. I prayed for courage and strength so that you may overcome any challenge, big or small. I prayed that you live this life with no regrets. I prayed that you will never forget how blessed and loved you are. 

I prayed that in time, you would find someone who would love you much more than I ever could.

Today, I made a vow to myself to learn to be happy again, without you.  

Today, I made a vow to be a better person for whomever I will meet in the future. 

Today, I decided that three months is long enough to grieve for you. 

Today, I made a vow, with God as my witness, to let you go. 

It's not so bad really. You're only the best I ever had.